MANscaping: D’s Law

By Deena Hamza

I find that a perfectly groomed man screams independence, self-sufficiency, and the ability to care and do for others. That being said, I am not attracted to perfectly arched eyebrows, french tipped or glossed nails, or waxed arms/legs/chest. In my world, a rugged man reigns supreme but ruggedness does not translate into an “un-kept” man. I’m sure my G.O.P’s have their own flavor but I think there should be a universal standard. Since no one has attempted to produce a standard since standards and stereotypes are shunned by the general public (I fully believe in positive stereotypes, positive generalizations and positive standards) I will therefore be the first to share my opinion (state the new Law).

D’s Law on MANscaping

1. Head hair should groomed whether you have short or long hair and there must be a style to it. Hair should be washed daily for G.O.P’s especially during the summer months
2. Bathing is REQUIRED both morning and night, anything more is a bonus
3. Nails must be clean and buffed with trimmed cuticles. A 1 mm white line is acceptable for both hands and feet
4. Body hair MUST be trimmed and kept under control. This includes underarm, chest, back, and below the equator hair
5. Assume that someone is going to come up and smell you. Deodorant and light cologne is also required
6. Although this goes beyond manscaping, undergarments MUST be changed at least twice a day
7. Facial hair must be groomed and have some sort of shape (remember rugged does not equate to sloppy)
8. Nose and ear hair must be trimmed at all times

 How do you feel about these guidelines? I find them to be justly fair. Remember, your outer image is the window to a possibly amazing interior. This is not about being superficial knowing that beauty is only skin deep but facts are facts. Would you want to be around someone with a pungent odor emanating from the bush growing under his arms, with dirty clothes and long dirt encrusted nails, and even a bird living in his beard?

P.S. We’re all short on time so efficiency is the game plan because time is money. Check out the Remington High Precision PG400 7 in 1 Grooming Kit ~$40 (Canadian Eh!).


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